Miranda Sainz

Goodbye

Never would I have imagined

That my happiness would depend on you

I realized that when I no longer had you

From spending time with you

To not hearing from you

I realize how lost I am without your presence

From our first words

To our last goodbye

It feel as though those were just words for you

As though for or me they came from the depths of me 

You lit a spark that I never knew was there

And now that you're gone

Nothing can trigger it any longer

Now I have to go on without you

Knowing that you're out there

As I drown in the mess you've caused me 

While you swim in the lies you solely live off

Despite this, my heart has no room for hatred towards you

Meanwhile yours has no room for me in it at all

Without You

As I sit and wander where I went wrong

You walk around with pride knowing that it was all you

Since you left me with no closure

I try and put the pieces together

When all along, what we had was broken

I wish I could have my old self back

But you took that from me

Now the only pieces I have left

Are the ones that you left me in

Shambles that I don’t know how to repair

Are the ones that need you, knowing you left

My mind knows I shouldn’t crave you as much as I still do

But my heart knows I can’t handle it 

I still have the slightest hope that this can be something better and new

But seeing me now, I don’t want to relive any of it

I want to move on from you

And learn to live without your words

Without your presence

Without your comfort

Without you

After You

This is to your future self

To the person you want to be, who you will be

What’s it like to live with serenity and peace

Was it hard?

How long did it take because I can’t seem to get out of this hole

It brings me comfort that you’ve healed all the wounds you've been caused

I thought that those pieces would never find their way back to each other

But time was good to you and proved me wrong

As I open my eyes

I wake up to this misery

And realize that I was still in this hole

There was no serenity or peace

There was no healed wounds

Only a pit of sorrows that I can’t escape from

Peace

Despite all the pain and hurt 

Life reminds me that it’s never time well worth spent to dwell on it

To rejoice in the numerous opportunities

And numerous people that life will present me with

There will be struggles

There will be people who seem to want nothing but mean harm to you

And that someone was you

But I will go on with calmness in my heart knowing that im so much more

So much more than who I was was with you

Because I was blind to my worth

I now go on without you, recognizing my importance

I thank you for the hurt because without it I wouldn’t be here now

Learning to love me
Knowing you never did

I know now that the one thing your absence left me with 

Is peace

Stranger

In a desk she sits

A stranger in front of her

No words are spoken

Two Souls

From a glare

There was a hello

You gave her a handshake

Then an invitation

Time took its place

And united two perfect souls

Realization

As my eyes wander upon my peers

I realize that these years aren’t forever

The day is coming when I will no longer see these faces

And I’ll start to miss them in my post high school life

I may not see it now, but these are the years I’ll long for in the future

How

How could I have fallen for you so deeply

When all along you were just like the rest

Rain

The rain fall from the sky

Were like the tears running down her face

Not knowing why she would cry

She thought back with her mind trying to trace

The salty tears in her mouth

Reminded her that she can now feel

What she couldn’t feel when things were south

Then in awe she fell to kneel

Since the numbness had faded

She could now heal and release all blame

That feeling was no longer the feeling of being degraded

For she no longer wanted to feel the shame

Liar

I believed you

Every word that came out of your mouth

You weren’t special

Everything you said was normal

My mind held you in such a high place

That I couldn’t realize that they were just words, without meaning

Now that you’re not here

I see how much of my time was wasted

Thinking about you endlessly

Now dwelling on it all

I’m glad I’ve escaped that cycle of patterns

In which I once fell for

Future

Her mom sees a bright future for her daughter 

But she can't see what it is

The future to her looks like a big blur

As if she has nothing ahead for her

Cat

The softness of the fur

And the pokes of whiskers

Along with the vibrations of purrs

Is where she finds her comfort

In her tiny favorite being

Moving ahead

As we prepare to begin the next chapters of our lives

In the midst of us are people who have big plans

Others not so much

We’ll all go our separate ways

Because of that, we won’t see each other create our future

Or where we end up